Saturday, June 20, 2009

Every Day I Gotta Fight To Prove My Love

I have been working on a journal publication with my black female student colleague, a white male professor who teaches in our department and a black male colleague of his that teaches at another institution. We each had our respective sections of the paper to work on which were completed with no issues. The closer we got to finishing the paper, we (myself and the black female student) were asked to work together on minor corrections such as editing, formatting, etc. We would meet and she would submit our work. The professor in our department called me to inform me that I need to be more vocal about my contributions when collaborating on papers; he claims that the black professor posed the question to him because the female submitted the emails. He said that I need to do a better job of letting everyone else know that I did my part; at the same time, he was not questioning if I had actually done the work, he just thought that this was a great opportunity for a "teachable moment." Really? I was personally and professionally offended. I informed him that I did not give up my past life to cheat my way to a Ph.d. I also told him that if he was sure that I had done the work, we would not be having this conversation. It appeared to be useless to send an additional email to say "I just wanted you to know that I did my part." My colleague just happened to be at the computer while we worked on the paper together. I immediately informed him that he was bringing negative energy to me and I wanted no part of it. I asked to be removed from the publication, in which he pleaded with me not to because it would appear that he failed as a "mentor." I felt that he questioned my ethics and gave the impression that I wanted a handout. He did not want me to see right thru his B.S. He did not expect for me to recognize that he in fact was questioning my contribution. It seems as though "Everyday I Gotta Fight To Prove My Love."